samedi 28 juillet 2007

mercredi 25 juillet 2007

Waiting for NYC

Just more few days, mylittlechicks, and I’ll fly to New York City.
Just 2 or 3 days of exhausting work et good morning Big Apple !
Everything is changed, actually : I don’t leave alone but with my friend Vivi who dreamt to visit New York and decided to come one week with me, in my loft ! A couple of friends of us will joins us too because they travel in Canada during august. And my friend C. who goes to Canada for a wedding will join me as well for few days !!!
I think that 11 days won’t be enough. Because I also have to go to my office there. And I’ll probably meet some French/American friends who live there.
Well. Anyway, it’ll be great.
I’m eager meeting Mary Jo, the owner of the apartment I’ve rent. She’ll welcome us when we arrive in East Village. It’d be nice if we could become friends and if she could show us the “real” new yorker way of life. I want to live like New Yorkers do although “vacations” aren’t really a new yorker concept !!
I’m going to try to blog every day to tell you my trip, thanks to The little stroll. But I’m not sure that the american wifi will work with French computer... And I’m not a computer’s specialist !!
Well, mylittlechicks, I’m very excited and I’m very eager to leave. All “beach, sex and sun” vacations couldn’t make me happier that this trip to NYC !
I leave you mylittlechicks and I’m goint to write an e.mail to Mary jo, the owner of “my” loft !!!
See you, sweethearts !

vendredi 13 juillet 2007

A spanking and go to bed !

Some young guys deserve to be spanked !
I’ve never thought I could get the chance to hear what I heard today.
Well, it’s done : today, Friday, July, the 13th, I’m in the dark side of the force.
The young gay man I hired told me this afternoon :
“No, really, I wish I could be like you when I’m the same age you’re today because you’re still “young minded”. Usually people in the same age are “has been”.
Damned stupid kid !
I’m 34 !
I really ask each person I told she (or he) wore well despite of her (or his) age” to forgive me.

jeudi 12 juillet 2007



Assessing, mylittlechicks.
I just come back from a pub night in the most beautiful city in the world (Levallois) with my English group. We spoke english, only english, with a young english teacher.
I like speaking english, I really like speaking english. I feel like I was travelling (and travelling, as everybody knows, is... adventure !). I feel freer too. Less me.
Except that I realized that other people had the same idea than I had : learning english as an hobby, an activity to meet people. And, actually, I was with a 42 years old woman, a 40 years old man, a 30 years old one. All single... And a 39 years old man who is getting divorced...
They obviuosly knew everything about me and my poor private life after only 30 secondes...
Why do single men have such an “unttractive” look on their face ? And why do married or engaged men look so sexy ?
Who knows, poor girl !
I’m surely look like they look.
Nevertheless, if you want to know everything, I get some “proposals” these days. 3 in fact. I don’t fancy any of them. So I feel guilty and tell myself I’m too hard to please. I should end with big emotions and passion and be pragmatic...
But do you really think I could be “pragmatic” ?!
I’m waiting for the “spark”. I’m telling to myself that the spark will fall on me one day.
Hurry up, spark.
I hope I’m not making a mistake.
I hired a young man, at work. 22 years old, gay. He’s scared of me. He told me that I’ve impressed him a lot.
I summonned him yesterday. So he didn’t sleep all night.
I give him big speeches about experience and life and youth and the best way to do our job, etc etc...
And I realize that I started working a long time ago now.
“Time goes by so quickly”, I thought.
I prefer to be in my position than in his. But, I used to be the youngest, and, now, I’m the “old”.
A cold brieze went through me.
And I know that I took “pleasure” to scare him with my “experience” and all these things about life and patience. Am I sadistic ?!
I’m a complete different person at work. You wouldn’t believe it.
You know what I’d like ?
And I don’t care if it’s immoral or bad.
I’d like that a married or engaged man leaves his wife for me.
Am I childish ?
Yes but you know, mylittlechicks, it’d flatter me !
And if he could speak english, it’s be better !
This is what I want.
I tell you it straight out.

lundi 9 juillet 2007

Cheers !

This morning, by 9 and half, quarter to ten, I was drinking a diet coke with a colleague of mine. We were at the café around the corner, a weird place where alcoholic men come to drink white wine at 7 am and play all their money at ‘rapido’ games. Most of all, please note the fag smell which makes you feel sick at the first second...
I was kindly drinking my coke when the young waitress, just in front of me, began to use the beer machine.
Beer ?? At 9 and half, quarter to ten in the morning ??
She had troubles with her beer machine. She splashed herself a little a first time. A second time. And a third time. But this wasn’t enough for her so she went on with her beer machine. She insisted and tried a fourth time...
And she sprinckled with beer on me !!
At 9 and half, quarter to ten in the morning !
From my hair to my trousers.
Just in front of the laughing alcoholic men !
Thank God, she didn’t sprinckle with beer on my new repetto shoes : I would certainly have killed her !
She apolologized. But coke wasn't free... I said ‘well, don’t worry : itdoesn’tmatter’. My eyes said the opposite.
Can you imagine me (I never drink alcohol), stinking beer at 9 and half, quarter to ten ??!!
And you know, beer really stinks !
So I came back home to change my clothes and wash my hair.
Tonight I came back after work and imagine that mylittlechicks : my apartment stank beer from floor to ceiling because I have left my clothes on the bed.
Berk !
Well, everything in the washing machine !
Berk !
Sprinckling on me with beer, what an idea !
So, to celebrate, I did art and I changed the ugly blog banner I made yesterday.
What do you think, mylittlechicks ?

dimanche 8 juillet 2007

Travelling means adventure, mylittlechicks, so I just come back from Barcelona.
(One of the typical Barcelona’s Gaudi Buildings)

I was there for work in fact. I stayed a few longer but I couldn’t really enjoy my trip as much as I wanted because I actually had many work problems and I almost spent the whole time on phone to solve them.
Well, nevertheless, I took time to breathe the Barcelona’s air.
Energy is what I’ll keep from this city.
Energy is what you can feel in this city. And lightness, and enjoying and beauty and youth. People from Barcelone all seem young and good looking and tanned ! Everywhere that sounds fiesta, crowded restaurants after midnight, beach, riding on the boardwalks, lovers...
I wish I could have stayed a bit longer but Barcelona isn’t a city you want to visit alone. I’m fed up with visiting cities alone, by the way.
Well, you know mylittlechicks, I actually left energy in Barcelona because I just met monaméricain (I won’t tell you all my life but ‘monaméricain’ is a new yorker who lives 2 streets from mine, in the most beautiful city in the world, I mean Levallois, 5 minutes from Paris – France. Monaméricain is the man I used to love. He doesn’t love me. That’s all !). He was with his daughter and a young lady, EXTREMELY young lady ! It broke me.
And I also saw that Allan Wills ( has finally found the woman of his life thanks to his blog.
No link between both stories but it shows that people are living and are going ahead. And I’m not. So, yes, it broke me.
I dont usually talk about my work on my blogs so you can’t know that I don’t stagnate in every part of my life. I’m going ahead with my job. I like what I do, I like people I work with and I have a lot of prospects and I’m lucky to be free and to get the opportunity to express myself.
I enjoy my job very much and I think that people I work for appreciate what I do.
And I enjoy my English courses a lot. I travel, I meet new people, I write : my life isn’t completely empty !
But, the truth is that, regarding my private life, I still stagnate. I don’t evolve, I don’t learn. I’m still so hurt and agressive and lost and maladjusted. I always feel I’m not as nice and pretty and interesting as others.
Well, mylittlechicks, itdoesn’tmatter !
Have a nice Sunday.